This is a sensitive subject for me. Its only about a good two maybe three people I talk to about this. I figure since writing has always been a passion of mine and I can get out emotions better this way that I would write about it. Also because today makes 8 years since my father Harvey Robinson passed away.
I was 13 years old and in the 7th grade. I remember it like it was yesterday. It was a dark and cloudy day. Unbeknown to future events that lie ahead I wore all black that day from head to toe. Didn't think that much of it. All of a sudden I get called out of my math class to report to the office. I was glad to get out of my least favorite subject. I saw my mom and I could tell something was bothering her. I didn't know what to think. Didn't know what to say. Little did I know that my life was about to turn upside down and it would never be the same again...EVER.
My mother told me words that I wasn't ready for. "We lost him...your father passed away." It didn't hit me right then and there. I remember going to pick up my little sister next. She was only 10. I didn't know how it would affect her. Didn't think it could happen to my family. You think your secure in your little bubble and at that age I only looked at the things in my world and never thought that anything in it could be taken away from me, but on that day I learned that wasn't true.
Since that day I've had to learn how to be a man on my own. I've had my uncles and other older figures give me advice here and there but majority of my accomplishments into the hard path to manhood I have learned and am still learning on my own. Everything happens for a reason. We don't always know what that reason is but I believe that there is a higher purpose for anything that happens. At least I like to believe that. Loosing someone that close to me has made me realize that life is to short. Anyone can be taken away in the blink of an eye. Anyone.
A friend of mine reminded me today that he's looking down at me right now and has watched me grow over the years. That comforts me. I also have a picture of him and me when I was a baby on my desk. I don't want to disappoint him. I'm doing my best. One day when I have a son I will try my hardest to live as long as I can to see all of his many accomplishments and make sure his journey into manhood isn't as tough as mine. He'll have a shoulder to lean on and someone to ask all the questions I had.
"Man I really miss my pops. Hope that God watches over him and that he's on top"...Lupe Fiasco
peacE!
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