Learning About "Self"

So there are still a lot of things in the back of my mind. A lot of mixed emotions that I need to deal with. Just feeling like I'm so busy and a lot of pressure from every angle. I know that God wouldn't send me through a trial without knowing that I would prevail with my head held high and making me a stronger man because of it. While I was working out today I felt a lot of stress leaving my body and it literally felt like I was leaving my woes in the dust. I'm looking ahead. No time for looking back.

Thats easier said then done though. In fact I would go so far as to say that I know what I just said isn't completely true. There are a few things prevalent to me that I still hold on to. No matter how much time has gone by. Like Goku said about emotions...their an aide to us. Without mine I wouldn't know where to go. And thats ashame cuz I'm already such and indecisive person. But when I do know what I want to do or pursue or my mind is made up then I know 100% that thats the road I'm seeking and so I'll take that destination.

My emotions are also my greatest downfall. I feel that my kindness is something I especially get taken advantage of with. I'm not saying I'm more honest then you or the next person, but I like to think differently then most people in many situations. I like to think of it as if this were to happen to me, how would I want to be treated in this instance? Its talked about in the Bible. The Golden Rule. I also feel that I've been dealt a bad hand with being to nice when it comes to the ladies, but I'm not going to change. I'll just work hard at every aspect of myself until even my weaknesses become an asset to me. Its like, if you can't beat it join it. If something is wrong with yourself that you cant fix then just work around it, or better yet you and your problem can coincide and strive for victory.

One last thing. I apologize in advance. I realized something today. I was walking to class and I was thinking about a lot of people that I care about and it seems like the ones I truly care about I hurt for no reason. It wont even be on purpose but I think I'm afraid to get to attached to anyone. So somehow sub concisely I sabotage myself without even knowing it. Sounds skeptical I know but I just need to do better with that. Can't be afraid to let the walls down and be afraid to care about someone. Might miss out on the girl of my dreams...

That felt therapeutic to get off my chest. In the famous words of Hiro Nakamura, "Yah Ta!!!!"





I'm not giving up. In fact, I have the sheer tenacity to Never Give UP! Thats something I've always done in the past. Just given up on something after the first try. Its different now. Life is TOOOOO SHORT!!!! I'm going to get out of my comfort zone!



peacE!